My first vision quest started as a survival challenge, but the setting and situation changed it into one of the best experiences of my life. It was so impactful that I voluntarily found a weekend this past summer to go and get alone with God.
As I have been reflecting on these times, I've seen how the lessons and insights I received from God have fit together. I first had to own the way that I approached life. I wasn't living, just siting by and hoping everything would one day fall into place. This realization awakened me to the fact that I needed to change, and do things differently, otherwise I was going to end up disappointed and full of regrets.
As I left the woods that first year, there was a lot to think about. As I started to make some changes to how I was approaching life, God began to direct my attention to some different areas; He was giving me some things to look at, work on, and pursue. When I entered the woods a second time almost a year later, these were the things God was focused on helping me to think about.
My first vision quest helped me to understand things about myself, and how I needed to do things differently. My second vision quest to the changes I was striving for, and helped me further understand what would be involved in pursing these new paths.
I feel that the first time I went into the woods, I was hoping that God would speak to me in a way that would lead to the restoration of my marriage. While God did help me to see the key aspects in myself that had contributed to the situation, He did not bring about restoration. I have never had the chance to share what I have learned with my ex-wife, and I had to come to accept the fact that restoration was not going to take place.
Upon accepting this, I had to realize that my life, ministry, relationships, and passions did not die with my marriage. It was not going to be easy, but I had to begin to pursue some of these new opportunities. There would be challenges, but God had created me to face them, and He would be with me as I stepped out in faith. God revealed, and God emboldened.
In the months following my first vision quest, I began to live differently. I started to live with more intentionallity. I began to carefully select the courses I was taking, the books I would read, and the paper topics I would choose to write on. I began to focus more of my planning for the men's retreats I lead around the life of Christ, drawing from His example, and striving to be more intentional about doing life with these men I am privileged to call brothers.
Following my second vision quest, I have begun to really pursue opportunities, knowing full well that there is going to be opposition to face and overcome. I have built on intentional living, and am now actively seeking to move towards some of the goals I have set, learning to rely on God when the lions begin to roar and move in.
These two experiences have been life changing, and I am looking forward to getting alone in the woods again with God this year. I don't know what He is going to share with me, but I fully believe He will speak, and that when He does, it will continue to build on what He is doing in my life.
Fight the lion, 1 Peter 5.1-11
TO GOD ALONE BE THE GLORY!
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