My first vision quest started as a survival challenge, but the setting and situation changed it into one of the best experiences of my life. It was so impactful that I voluntarily found a weekend this past summer to go and get alone with God.
As I have been reflecting on these times, I've seen how the lessons and insights I received from God have fit together. I first had to own the way that I approached life. I wasn't living, just siting by and hoping everything would one day fall into place. This realization awakened me to the fact that I needed to change, and do things differently, otherwise I was going to end up disappointed and full of regrets.
As I left the woods that first year, there was a lot to think about. As I started to make some changes to how I was approaching life, God began to direct my attention to some different areas; He was giving me some things to look at, work on, and pursue. When I entered the woods a second time almost a year later, these were the things God was focused on helping me to think about.
My first vision quest helped me to understand things about myself, and how I needed to do things differently. My second vision quest to the changes I was striving for, and helped me further understand what would be involved in pursing these new paths.
I feel that the first time I went into the woods, I was hoping that God would speak to me in a way that would lead to the restoration of my marriage. While God did help me to see the key aspects in myself that had contributed to the situation, He did not bring about restoration. I have never had the chance to share what I have learned with my ex-wife, and I had to come to accept the fact that restoration was not going to take place.
Upon accepting this, I had to realize that my life, ministry, relationships, and passions did not die with my marriage. It was not going to be easy, but I had to begin to pursue some of these new opportunities. There would be challenges, but God had created me to face them, and He would be with me as I stepped out in faith. God revealed, and God emboldened.
In the months following my first vision quest, I began to live differently. I started to live with more intentionallity. I began to carefully select the courses I was taking, the books I would read, and the paper topics I would choose to write on. I began to focus more of my planning for the men's retreats I lead around the life of Christ, drawing from His example, and striving to be more intentional about doing life with these men I am privileged to call brothers.
Following my second vision quest, I have begun to really pursue opportunities, knowing full well that there is going to be opposition to face and overcome. I have built on intentional living, and am now actively seeking to move towards some of the goals I have set, learning to rely on God when the lions begin to roar and move in.
These two experiences have been life changing, and I am looking forward to getting alone in the woods again with God this year. I don't know what He is going to share with me, but I fully believe He will speak, and that when He does, it will continue to build on what He is doing in my life.
Fight the lion, 1 Peter 5.1-11
TO GOD ALONE BE THE GLORY!
Wednesday, February 28, 2018
Monday, February 26, 2018
Distant Reflections
I haven't had as much time to process this vision quest, and in all honesty, I've had a lot more to process in the 7ish months since I was in the woods than with the previous retreat, but I feel that the my life has been a constant reflection on what I learned/realized during the time spent in the woods. These two verses from the quest have constantly been on my mind.
Proverbs 22.13
The sluggard says, "There is a lion outside; I will be killed in the streets."
Proverbs 26.13
The sluggard says, "There is a lion in the road! A lion is in the open square!"
My life has been one constant plan change after another, and it seems like everything I come up with is changed for me. I'll be the first to admit that I have had my moments of panicked frustration. I've spent more than a few hours asking God, "Why is this so hard? Why does this have to happen this way?" I have had my moments of rolling with things and learning to trust. I've found myself being led by God more directly, and more often than I have, maybe ever, before in my life.
The biggest thing that I have to keep in mind is that there is a lion outside, more than one, and that he isn't going anywhere. He is going to stand out there, looking for a meal, and he is content to wait and catch someone off guard. The fact that I'm aware that they're out there gives me an advantage, but it only matters if I have the courage to go out there and face them.
I can play it safe, which I've been tempted to do on more than one occasion. I can stay status quo, not ruffle any feathers, and just go with the flow, safe in my house, away from the teeth and claws of a couple several hundred pound lions. That's no way to live, and in all honesty, that's worse than being eaten. I don't want to play it safe anymore.
There are lions outside, just waiting for an easy meal, and enjoying watching the fear and inaction their presence has caused. I refuse to be a victim of their intimidation any longer. The time has come for me to take some action.
I'm currently in the process of trying to move towards my future. I'm actively seeking ways to help myself move towards the role of Old Testament Scholar/professor of Old Testament Literature/Involved college professor-mentor who makes a difference in the lives of students.
The lions are out there, and they aren't going anywhere. They've been allowed to get comfortable, and they like it just fine where they are. I don't like where I am because of my fear of being eaten, and I've had enough. I'm suiting up, grabbing my sword and shield, and heading outside, to face the lions in the road.
That is what this quest, both of them, has been about. Face your fear, step out in faith, and face the lions.
Fight the lion, 1 Peter 5.1-11
TO GOD ALONE BE THE GLORY!
Proverbs 22.13
The sluggard says, "There is a lion outside; I will be killed in the streets."
Proverbs 26.13
The sluggard says, "There is a lion in the road! A lion is in the open square!"
My life has been one constant plan change after another, and it seems like everything I come up with is changed for me. I'll be the first to admit that I have had my moments of panicked frustration. I've spent more than a few hours asking God, "Why is this so hard? Why does this have to happen this way?" I have had my moments of rolling with things and learning to trust. I've found myself being led by God more directly, and more often than I have, maybe ever, before in my life.
The biggest thing that I have to keep in mind is that there is a lion outside, more than one, and that he isn't going anywhere. He is going to stand out there, looking for a meal, and he is content to wait and catch someone off guard. The fact that I'm aware that they're out there gives me an advantage, but it only matters if I have the courage to go out there and face them.
I can play it safe, which I've been tempted to do on more than one occasion. I can stay status quo, not ruffle any feathers, and just go with the flow, safe in my house, away from the teeth and claws of a couple several hundred pound lions. That's no way to live, and in all honesty, that's worse than being eaten. I don't want to play it safe anymore.
There are lions outside, just waiting for an easy meal, and enjoying watching the fear and inaction their presence has caused. I refuse to be a victim of their intimidation any longer. The time has come for me to take some action.
I'm currently in the process of trying to move towards my future. I'm actively seeking ways to help myself move towards the role of Old Testament Scholar/professor of Old Testament Literature/Involved college professor-mentor who makes a difference in the lives of students.
The lions are out there, and they aren't going anywhere. They've been allowed to get comfortable, and they like it just fine where they are. I don't like where I am because of my fear of being eaten, and I've had enough. I'm suiting up, grabbing my sword and shield, and heading outside, to face the lions in the road.
That is what this quest, both of them, has been about. Face your fear, step out in faith, and face the lions.
Fight the lion, 1 Peter 5.1-11
TO GOD ALONE BE THE GLORY!
Friday, February 23, 2018
Initial Reflections
Below is what I wrote in my journal about a month and a half after my quest.
Vision Quest 2017 Reflection (9/4/17)
This trip did not go as planned. I lost my hammock in the dark, and I left my hammock because I got worried about my car. My first thought when I headed to meet (my pastor friend) was "Well this is shot" but then I realized "No, this is part of it."
The next morning after finding my stuff I thought of a verse, and when I sat down, I couldn't find it. God had His plans.
As I reflected on this quest, the idea of a the journey has kept coming to me. (My pastor friend) mentioned it as we sat and talked; Jeremy mentioned it months ago. I feel that is what god is trying to teach me, has been trying for a while.
This is about the journey, like the process of forging a katana, it takes time, and the process is what make it so amazing.
Life doesn't go as planned, and that's ok. We focus on the destination, which we must have, but the point is the journey there.
Proverbs 22.13
The sluggard says, "There is a lion outside; I will be killed in the streets."
Proverbs 26.13
The sluggard says, "There is a lion in the road! A lion is in the open square!"
There will always be a reason not to embark on the journey; not to take that first step. But without the journey, we never get to the destination.
Life is about the journey. Sometimes we have to find a different path there, but we must stay focused and keep moving. god works through the "set backs", and uses them to help us minister to others.
Fight the lion, 1 Peter 5.1-11
TO GOD ALONE BE THE GLORY!
Vision Quest 2017 Reflection (9/4/17)
This trip did not go as planned. I lost my hammock in the dark, and I left my hammock because I got worried about my car. My first thought when I headed to meet (my pastor friend) was "Well this is shot" but then I realized "No, this is part of it."
The next morning after finding my stuff I thought of a verse, and when I sat down, I couldn't find it. God had His plans.
As I reflected on this quest, the idea of a the journey has kept coming to me. (My pastor friend) mentioned it as we sat and talked; Jeremy mentioned it months ago. I feel that is what god is trying to teach me, has been trying for a while.
This is about the journey, like the process of forging a katana, it takes time, and the process is what make it so amazing.
Life doesn't go as planned, and that's ok. We focus on the destination, which we must have, but the point is the journey there.
Proverbs 22.13
The sluggard says, "There is a lion outside; I will be killed in the streets."
Proverbs 26.13
The sluggard says, "There is a lion in the road! A lion is in the open square!"
There will always be a reason not to embark on the journey; not to take that first step. But without the journey, we never get to the destination.
Life is about the journey. Sometimes we have to find a different path there, but we must stay focused and keep moving. god works through the "set backs", and uses them to help us minister to others.
Fight the lion, 1 Peter 5.1-11
TO GOD ALONE BE THE GLORY!
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