Entitled to Someday

After a few more minutes of processing the realities that had been revealed to me, I got up and started walking again. The trail I was walking is a loop, and at one point there is a side trail that leads to a lake. I typically avoid this side trail because their is a semi decent hill, going to the lake isn't bad, it's coming back that isn't the most enjoyable. I had no intention of visiting the lake that day, but I felt God leading me in that direction. After a few minutes of hesitating, I turned right and headed to the lake.

I walked around the water until I came to a bench, where I sat down and began to think. I pulled out a few index cards and began to write down a few notes about the experience. I talked about my feelings of panic from that morning, the oak mite bites which at that point I was still identifying as a mosquito attack, my thoughts on food and water, how tired I was feeling, and the owls that had deprived me of sleep. And then I wrote out reflections of my previous two bench moments.

Living for Someday- wasting time
Waiting for Someday- missing the moment

That's where I was at the moment, realizing how I had been living and the implications of that lifestyle. At this point, sitting there in the early afternoon sun, I began to think about how I had been raised, the things I had been told, and the expectations I had. I pulled out a few more index cards, and wrote out these words.

Entitled to Someday 8/26/16

My life has felt like you work hard and things should work out.

Get good grades, graduate on top, = good job

Work hard, provide, invest in the future, = wife happy/appreciative

Put the effort into it = get the (sports, church, relationships) reward

I feel like I've earned someday, like I deserve it. I'm entitled to it, and anyone who gets in the way and hinders it, or doesn't fit with my idea of someday, I have no time for

I have an ideal thought where everything is perfect, but that isn't reality.

There will always be problems.
There will always be annoyances.
Nothing will ever be completely ideal.

I'm not entitled to it.

Genesis 3.17-19

Cursed is the ground

thorns and thistles

By the sweat of your face

Dust you are, to dust you shall return.

...


Fight the lion, 1 Peter 5.1-11

TO GOD ALONE BE THE GLORY!